From Awareness Builder 101: Chapter 23

23. Raison d’être

 

As a coach, I often hear people sharing they’re not happy. Life is boring, their job is a pain. It just doesn’t give them satisfaction and every working day they long for the weekend. Yet the weekend doesn’t give the answer either. The next thing is an ongoing longing for retirement, not seldom dying from boredom shortly after.

 

A place with a rather different perspective on work, compared to most of the world, is Japan. Here is something funny, they don’t even have a word in their language for retirement such as we know it in Western cultures. Japan also has the world’s highest life span expectations, including high number of centennials. Next to an overall healthier lifestyle, most of the centennials keep themselves active, every single day.

What is it, that enables them to get up early every day to start their tasks with a happy heart and a smile on their face? No, money isn’t the answer, nor is status. Yes, they get (financial) compensation for their work and they also are respected for it. But these are a side catch, not the driving force! Their reason to get out of bed early isn’t external, they found the driving force within themselves.

 

You’re probably familiar with the experience that you, whilst doing something you totally love, completely loose sense of time. Your whole self is occupied with that one thing you’re doing. As if you’re in a state of trance. You become one with the activity such as the concert pianist becomes one with the grand piano. The only thing that can stop them playing, is the end of that piece of music. Not time nor tiredness. They’re in an unstoppable flow whilst the music comes to life through them. Why can’t artists stop creating, even when there’s only little financial reward or recognition? Why is one person going to work with a huge smile on their face whilst the person next to them in the same traffic jam couldn’t bother less? Why do some of us really don’t understand the concept of retirement?

 

The one thing they have in common is that they found their ‘raison d’être’. Their reason for being, or as the Japanese call it, their Ikigai. When we connect with the purpose of our life, when we consciously start bringing our activities in line with that, our work transforms into honouring our calling. Each moment we dedicate to that, is a joyful moment. Is a moment of flow. Where we forget about time, about the world around us. Yes, there will be obstacles to overcome, of course! Life will not just be a smooth ride to glory and success. But, as Nietzsche said: “He who has a why to live for, can bear almost any how”.

 

It is such a strong force of energy, impossible becomes an unacceptable word. There are even studies proving that survivors of the Nazi camps had one thing in common: a reason to live on the other side of the fence. Our fences are often self-created…..My longing for you is that you find your reason(s) to climb and conquer these fences. That you find your ‘raison d’être’.

 

 

Journaling questions for this chapter:

 

What is the purpose I see for myself in life?

 

What are the fences I created between me and actually living that?

 

What is waiting for me on the other side of the fence?

 

 

© 2025. Alex Verlek, Coaching Works International.

 

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